


"THIS JUST IN: VOLDEMORT STAGGED IN THE F**KING FACE!"

by annienibs



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: ALL THE FLUFF, AU maruaders, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Good Peter Pettigrew, James Potter is a hero, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), No Angst, and they were ROOMMATES, happiness, no hurt, what should have happened, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:19:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24718162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annienibs/pseuds/annienibs
Summary: What if when Lord Voldemort comes to kill Harry and his parents that Halloween night James just turned into bloody Stag form and just takes him on.What if the marauders all love each other, Pete wasn't the one to give them up and find ways to protect each other that not even Dumbledore knows!Pretty much Everybody lives because the marauders boys were stupid enough to become animagus’ years ago and not tell anyone.Just a pick me up story if you are feeling down, crack, love, humour and happiness.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 11
Kudos: 197





	"THIS JUST IN: VOLDEMORT STAGGED IN THE F**KING FACE!"

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I’ve had this idea for awhile now since I saw this meme post about James taking on Lord Voldemort in Stag form that night and it is blossomed into a full story line. So strap up for the mess of a hilarious idea of everybody lives because the boys don't like following rules or the law and James is just wild and will just take on Voldy no matter what (In this AU peter wasn’t the one to give up the Potters, hes a good friend and loves them and they love him... Okay thanks.)

When the boys left Hogwarts they felt the strain and worry of not being able to know when the others are in the trouble.  
Honestly it comes from being so dependant and having each others backs for so long that being apart is hard. But they have to move out, move on but between the fear that Pete may set fire to his kitchen, Lily killing James and of course the wizarding war they decided something needed to be done.  
They needed a method. 

It was actually Sirius who came up with the idea, looking to Remus of course to see if it was possible. It was hard and messy to get right, especially since it had to be kept secret, but after 8 long months they did it. 

Whenever any of them turned into their animagus forms it did two things.  
One send a brainwave to the others that there was something wrong and from there two, all it would take is for them to apparate on the spot and BOOM they would appear inches from the original marauder who sent out the call. 

This of course still had it's set backs firstly that only 3 of the 4 boys had animagus forms. But as Remus said it still an amazing idea because  
A) Turning into their animal forms did not take a wand so could be done in the most direr of situations and  
B) no one else knew of their animagus forms meaning it couldn't be used against them. But still it left Remus vulnerable. 

This lead to, as James refers to it -The smoothest move of 1978-, where Sirius 'suggested' that Remus should live with him that way if danger happened he could turn for Remus.  
Remus, blushing stuttered an answer of "Are you asking me to move in with you?"  
To which Sirius blushed even harder and stuttered a mixture of long messy sentences including things like "Safety" and "Not alone". Finishing when Remus smiled the biggest smile putting his hand to Sirius mouth and said "Yes". 

Of course like said that was only one of the problems.  
The other being that there were many cases, especially in the beginning, when the boys turned but didn't need assistance or at least didn't mean to turn. T  
he most famous case being when Sirius turned from man to dog in his sleep mid-nightmare, which of course lead to both James and Pete blasting into the bedroom wands at the ready scaring the crap out if Sirius making him change back. This wouldn't have been that big of memory if Remus hadn't been laid in said bed naked with Sirius. James laughed so hard he swear he broke a lung as Sirius rolled into Remus arms moaning in embarrassment. While Pete's hands flew to his eyes in very Pete way, muttering with pink cheeks "So much for the the spare room ai mate". 

However even with the mistakes the method proved to be needed the one time it actually counted this being one of the biggest panics of James life.  
Lily going into labour. He didn't even think the moment he changed into his stag when she woke him up in the middle of the night. Lily would have been fuming had it not been for the saviour that is Remus Lupin. As soon as he appeared he was there, calming, educated but honestly it was the fact he could deal with  
A) a crying James  
B) a hysterical Sirius  
C) a anxious Pete  
All while barking orders to them and getting Lily to the healer with perfect composer. Eventually, through the whole chaos that is the marauders Harry was born and they all agreed that the method was needed now more than ever. 

Of course nothing could have prepared the marauders for what was to come that night. 

The Halloween night that was of 1981 started like many of the past days with the Potters now in hiding.  
They had dinner, James sat with Harry telling him wild and wonder stories of his time at Hogwarts until Lily appeared after her bath kissing James on the cheek saying it was her turn to put Harry to Bed and setting upstairs. 

Being in hiding had been hard for James at first, it was the first time since they all left that James couldn't have his friends there, couldn't have his family close especially with Harry being so small it made him feel so vulnerable. It had taken Sirius to push him into it, he had to protect Harry and Lily, had to keep them safe. Plus as Remus said James knew they were there, at the back of his mind always there. And could be there when danger calls for it. James had thought about this, about the magic that kept them hidden safe, if the method could get through. It was Dumbledore after all who put it up...But this was Marauder magic after all. He would put his faith in Remus Lupin's magic skills over death himself.

James was just about to follow upstairs wanting to watch the interaction that was his wife and child when it happened.  
The front door flew open and there he was. James had never seen him before but he know, lord Voldemort. 

Time seemed to freeze, James knew in his logical mind it must have only been seconds before it happened but it felt like a life time.  
A life time to think and decide.  
The first place James head flew to was WAND.  
and of course he didn't have it. He could physically feel Sirius smacking him for being so stupid.  
The next step was FIGHT/FLIGHT but honestly there was no question his child his love, he was the only thing between. He knew if Voldemort got though they would be dead. Lily's body, baby Harry... No Fight it must be.  
But with no wand and watching the dark lord lift his wanded hand he didn't even think, just reacted. Do first plan later as Sirius liked to say. 

James felt his body change, feeling his hooves hit the floor as he leapt towards Voldemort, antlers raised body throbbing with the need. 'Protect' 'Mate' 'Child' 'Kill'.  
When his antlers pierced through flesh was when he heard it, the loud cracks that suggested he was no longer alone. Felt the comfortable feel of them, that only comes from living for each other for years.  
Again for the the second time that evening the world seemed to slow, haze, blur. It was all senses, feelings.  
He felt the searing nausea that only comes from spells hitting ones body. Felt the pressure against his antlers still holding tight and the sharp tang of blood as it dripped down his snout. Heard the shouting, the spells, a scream, felt the words of Remus Lupin cut into the air "LILY, TO HARRY NOW!".  
It was numbing and burning and passion and James couldn't breathe. 

Only once he felt the body he was forcing against the wall finally give, the throw of blood-curling spells stop and the fur on his neck finally lay did his body give, change and hit the ground giving into darkness. 

The first thing James became aware of was the feeling of extreme pins and needles falling over each area of his body. He could recognise that pain, has been able to since the first time a prank had back fired and set him and Sirius to Madam Pomfrey with matching broken arms.  
Healing spells. Intense ones if he says so himself. The next was the noise. It was loud so very loud and and filled with many voices. He groaned. 

"He's awake"  
He smelt her first. Could recognise that smell anywhere. "James. James" 

Lily came into sight as he opened his eyes. Her eyes were blood shot, wet, face a mess. She had been crying. But held the biggest smile. "Lily?" 

She sobbed out a yes smiling and crying and holding his face. Then it hit him. "HARRY? HARRY! WHER-" 

"Jame-" "He's here you big dumb hero, just enjoying Godfather time" 

James head swung at the sound as finally took in the world around him.  
He was in their living room, laid on their sofa. Lily was still kneeling next to him wrapped in her famous bright red dress gown hair pulled high in a bun. Pete sat next to her on the small table, hand on her shoulder a small red line across his face but smiling no smaller than lily. A blur of people running back and forth in the hall could been seen. Remus sat on the arm rest of the sofa wand in hand still muttering spells as his hovered over James body. He too was smiling, one of his small real ones only saved for the marauders. He too looked quite dishevelled in one of Sirius old band t shirts and old PJ bottoms. 

James eyes finally land on Sirius stood across. He was smiling, his hair its Iconic Sirius Black bun while he held a gurgling baby Harry against his bare chest.  
Harry was fine, Lily was fine, his family were there, they were all fine. James could breathe again. 

"Are they my Pyjama bottoms?" James asked tilting his head in Sirius' direction

Sirius gave out a bark of a laugh. "You literally just took on the fucking dark lord in prongs form and that's the first thing you ask?" 

"They are!" James shouted back laughed harder has Sirius came plonking down at his feet baby Harry still held tight against him. 

The laughter finally died down filled only with a comfortable happy babbling of Harry "What happened?" James asked. 

"He came James, he found us." Lily filled in, hand finding his. 

"Yeah but prongs is like a machine!" Pete said causing Sirius to chuckle again. 

"I don't really.. I can't. How did you guys?" James head pounded.

"The method James you changed into prong. We were just getting into bed when we felt it, the call. It was so late and with you in hiding we didn't even think we just apparated" Remus adds 

"Yeah didn't even grab trousers in my case!" Sirius laughed 

"I had just got in after work" Pete gesters to his work uniform "Like they said I didn't think just went.. But I mean I didn't expect-" 

"Yeah not gonna lie bit of a shock, pop in expecting the worst but dude. You were- Shit man. It was-" Sirius rubbed his face, pulling Harry tighter to him. 

"We appreaed just in time to see you pierce Vol-Voldemort straight in the chest, had him up against the wall it was a miracle he didn't hit you with a spell" Remus sighed tight faced.

"To be honest I think it was a bit of a shock like break in to kill someone an they just fucking turn into a stag and leap at you I think you would take a second to deal with it too" Sirius joked 

"Well anyway that second was all we needed. Didn't even think, Sirius threw the first curse and it just went from there." Remus said 

"I came down mid way through hearing the shouting the curses, I didn't even make it half way down the stairs before Remus-" 

"Lily, to Harry now" James muttered repeating Remus' words 

Lily nodded "I wanted to join to help to sav-" 

"No, Lily Harry needed protection. Remus was right. Thank you" He turned grabbing Remus' knee to squeeze it. 

"How am I not dead?" James asked honestly, looking at Harry as he cooed into Sirius

"That's all Pete there. While I was throwing death curses harder than I ever had. Remus was busy flicking between the same and throwing protection cures backwards towards where Lily would be with Harry. But Pete, Pete didn't even throw one curse at him, he threw a protection curse on you and didn't let it go until the dick lords wand hit the floor" Sirius nodded towards Pete

"Pete-" "Well it wasn't that great you still got hurt" Peter muttered looking to the ground 

"Hes alive because of you. Harry gets a dad because of you" Lily had let go of James hand to wrap her arms around Peter kissing his head 

"Pete dude that, I can't- Thank you. Thank all of you. I'm sorry I dragged you all into th-" 

"Oh shut it. I think 'I'm about to face Lord Voldemort, wandless I may add!', qualifies for calling upon your mates" Sirius grins tapping his thigh in comfort. 

Silence filled the room again as Harry's baby snores settled down.  
"Is he, you know, Voldemort?" James gestured towards the hall way still brimming with activity from people he was starting to recognise. The order. 

"Yes. Once his wand dropped it was over. He was good but taking on a surprise attack of 3 trained wizards and a stag, hes dead. His body hit the floor as soon as you changed back into a human. We grabbed you, Remus got you stable, then we called the order and held his body under magic just in case. Dumbledore came, Verified he was dead and the calls started. The rest you can see there." Sirius gestured outside the doorway once more. 

"Dumbledore said the body was dealt with and burnt. Said the finale horcruxe of the snake was killed not too long before you awoke and the order members are beginning to disassemble the deatheaters as we speak. It's over James" Lily whispered 

James was the first to laugh. Because what else can you do at a time like this. They turned to him smiling.  
"I'm sorry but what exactly did you say when you called Dumbledore for the order. Oh hi so we have the dark lord dead in the Potters living room with Antler marks in his chest and we are magically here in the hidden hideout because we became illegal animagus' when we were are school." James pants holding his side in pain with the laughter. 

"Oh no mate it gets better we couldn't get hold of Dumbledore so we went to the next best thing.." Sirius cackles 

" You didn't!" 

"Yep we called on McGonagall" James Howls, the rest following the laughter so hard it actually attracts a few head turns from the hall way. 

"She was actually very calm, I think shes so used to our shit it didn't phase her" Remus laughs. 

The next couple of hours were long and hard. So many questions, orders, people wanting to hug them, hold them shake their hands. Eventually Lily put her foot down, they did still have baby Harry, and McGonagall agreed that everything else could wait till tomorrow and ordered the four marauders (Lily and Harry) back to Sirius/Remus which they took gratefully. After showers and food they find themselves all huddled in the living room. Sprawled on sofas, spare mattresses dragged in and a mixture of colourful old blankets content, sleepy but happy.

"I just can't believe it" Sighed James as he tugged Harry closer to his chest breathing in his smell. 

"I know its actually over" Sighed Pete leaning his head against James knee from where he sat on the floor

"Oh no, well yeah that's huge but I wasn't referring to that" chuckled James 

"What were you referring too then?" Remus lifting his hand from Sirius hair were he lay in his lap. 

"I just can't believe that Sirius fucking took on Lord Voldemort in his underwear!" 

"Says you who bloody ran at him as a stag!" Shrieked Sirius 

"Oh god imagine the Prophet's headlines for tomorrow!" 

And they laughed and laughed and eventually all fell asleep together because they were all safe and happy and had their whole futures together ahead of them. 

P.S  
Prophets headline the next day  
"THIS JUST IN: VOLDEMORT STAGGED IN THE F**KING FACE!"  
Sirius snorts so loud James nearly chokes on his cereal.


End file.
